Isaac's Birth Story

So our second child was due August 19^th and was expected to be about 8 lbs…hahaha…what a joke!

The Women’s Hospital of Texas in Houston was recommended to us by everyone we spoke to in Texas for the delivery of our baby. It’s funny, actually, we lived in Baytown and everyone said “Never get medical care in Baytown! Go to Houston!” So once insurance kicked in I started my search for a doctor. I was 36 weeks along and didn’t know where I was going to have this baby or who would be there to help me. I was so far along in my pregnancy that over 40 doctors would not accept me as their patient. At 37 weeks I was telling Brad to start Googling “how to deliver a baby at home” just in case. All the offices that declined me for care told me to” just go to the nearest ER” when I was in labor.

I was discouraged but kept calling till I found Dr. Bruce. She was very kind and we got along very well. I think mainly because she kept telling me how incredible I was for having delivered a 10lb 8oz baby naturally and unmedicated. Dr. Bruce was not shy about sharing her opinions, she constantly made cracks about “better living through chemistry” and how pitocin and an epidural would make for a smaller baby and thus an improved birthing experience. She was funny in giving her suggestions but didn’t really try to pressure me. I appreciated that. She did an ultrasound on me the week of my due date and said that the baby seemed to be weighing about 8pounds. My due date came but still no baby. There were lots of contractions while my mother was in town, we thought for sure I was going into labor, but alas no baby. My wonderful mother wanted to be there for the birth so badly so she could be our doula. Instead she took care of us. She slept on our air mattress, cooked for us, cleaned for us and even read to us. We were intent on finishing “The Help” before she left. Mission accomplished and it was a spectacular! Since we hadn’t had the baby yet my mom took Garrett home with her to Colorado and that was a huge blessing! It was so nice to get to sleep in and go on a few dates with my husband before having another baby.

Four days AFTER my due date Dr. Bruce tried to do another ultrasound but for some odd reason was unable to get a weight on the baby. Since my blood pressure had been high, Dr. Bruce feared we’d have another huge baby AND we were already over our due date AND we had to move back to Colorado the following week we were induced the next day.

August 24^th 2011 6:15 AM

We checked into the labor and delivery floor of the supposedly best hospital in Texas. My nurse was Kristin. I was her only patient for the day and she was wonderful! My doctor came in and broke my water for me and said that she’d give us four hours to bring on labor before she started pushing pitocin on me. Anyone who knows my brother Dean knows why I was trying so desperately to avoid pitocin. So we walked. Just like my last birth, I had to WORK to go into labor. That’s so not fair! Why can’t I just “go into labor” like other women?! With my wonderful Brad by my side, I walked for 4 hours. At 6 centimeters dilated and 90% effaced and a broken water, I walked the halls. At exactly four hours, when my doctor said she was going to come give me pitocin, I went into labor. Which is kind of bitter sweet. “Oh thank you Heavenly Father, I went into labor! …Oh No, Heavenly Father please save me, I’M IN LABOR!” (Later on it would become…”Oh just let me die!” lol)

Brad was able to coach me through contractions with breathing really well for the first few hours. He was wonderful and with me every step of the way. The hard part was being so tired, thirsty, hungry and cold…and in pain of course. But the hospital did not allow you to eat or DRINK, NOT EVEN WATER, for the eight hours prior to check in all the way until you had the baby. That’s right…NOT EVEN WATER. During labor. INSANE! And I was freezing the whole time too! The room was just so cold! I swear that place was run by a bunch of savages!

As contractions increased in intensity and came more rapidly we were trying anything we could think of to help me cope with the pain. They had no birth bar. They had no birth ball. They had no birthing tub, which really stunk because that’s how I was able to cope during my birth with Garrett. (Birthing Tubs are Amazing!) They had a shower that was as big as a port-a-potty and had a water stream that could barely cover my hand… and it only had luke warm water. That did not help the fact that I was already so so cold.

Kristin was incredible. She said only like 5% of women who use that hospital deliver their babies without medication. She wasn’t at all used to helping women cope through a natural birth. She went and tracked down another nurse, one who had helped in home births, and asked her for tips and tricks. Kristin really did try everything she could think of to help me.

Eventually the contractions were more intense than they were with Garrett and they never stopped. There was no break between contractions. They came one right after the other, sometimes on top of each other. I couldn’t ever catch my breath so breathing exercises became useless.

I had to talk myself through this mentally, which is something I did not do with Garrett. With Garrett I literally checked out. I hate admitting this, but I checked out so deep to cope with the labor and delivery of Garrett that I don’t remember much of it…and I didn’t check back in until 6 months later. It was so traumatizing for me that mentally I went into a dark hole, locked the door and lost the key for the first months of Garrett’s life. I almost feel as though I cheated Garrett out of something…out of more…out of a mom. So with contractions coming and having no way to deal with them I mentally and then vocally said “I don’t have to do this. I don't have to be strong. I have nothing to prove.” Brad tried to coach me through a few more contractions, knowing I really had wanted to have an unmedicated birth again. But after another plea he told me do whatever I felt I needed to do. I’d been 9 cm dilated for two hours and not going anywhere.

I asked for an epidural and it seemed like it took FOREVER for the doctor to come and give it to me. When the anesthesiologist did finally come, he was wonderful. He was great as he educated me and walked me through every step he was doing. His bedside manner was perfect. I love that man. Meanwhile, Brad was asked to leave the room, as all fathers are. He fell apart as he stood out in the hallway. He didn’t want me to feel like a failure and thus felt like he’d failed me as a birthing coach. And at first he was right about me. I kept thinking to myself “I’ve done this! Why do I feel like I can’t do it again! 10 lbs 8oz-es of baby came out without meds before! Why is this so much harder! This baby is supposed to be SMALLER even!” I did think I failed. Brad wasn't at all a failure though. Brad was perfect and could not have done anything better or more for me. But I failed. I couldn’t do my part. It's not that I think of women who have epidurals in any negative light, not by any means. Having a baby is hard! However, it wasn't ever a part of My birth plan and like I said, this baby was supposed to be easier so I was faced with realizing that I couldn't reach the bar that I'd set for Myself.

Thankfully I had no side effects from the epidural. I remember that I kept commenting on how great it was to be warm. I had the feeling back in my hands and toes again! The warmth was amazing! I could still move myself and felt pressure so the delivery wasn’t difficult at all. I had the baby 45 minutes and five pushes after getting the epidural. The medication relaxed me enough to allow the baby to move down. I was so glad the drugs didn’t slow down labor, give me a headache or make it difficult to push or any of the other junk that can go with an epidural. 6:01 pm the baby was born and he was covered in meconium, so we were a little freaked out. It turns out that the epidural was good for him too- all those unrelenting contractions caused him to be distressed. Thankfully there was nothing wrong with him. Our new son was perfect and healthy. I noticed he looked more like me than Brad but he does have his nose. I was surprised to hear that I’d torn again, since this baby was supposed to be smaller than Garrett. I thought for sure everything had been stretched out from that boy! And then I found out how big he was.

11 POUNDS 1 OUNCE and 22 INCHES LONG.

Another bitter sweet moment occurred. “Love Hormones” kicked in. I was so completely wrapped up in my newborn. He was so perfect and beautiful and sweet and…I’d never felt like this before. Never. Not even when I had Garrett. Again a twinge of guilt swept over me. I did everything I was supposed to with Garrett and I learned to love him. I felt guilty that it came so naturally, that love from a parent to a child, with Isaac. I love them both and now don’t know what I would do without them. I have embraced motherhood. It took some time but I’m there now.

I’m the mother to two beautiful, little boys. Garrett Bradley is the big brother to Isaac Daniel. Brad is an incredible husband and father and the love of my life. We are now a family of four.

Isaac, Brad and I left the hospital happy and healthy…and then moved back to Colorado two days later.

** The only thing I would add to this is what Danielle was like after she got the epidural. As soon as I walked back in she was all smiles, and clearly feeling much better. On top of that, she was SO CHATTY. She went on and on to anyone who had ears about how warm it was, about how nice she felt, and about how hard labor was. She clearly didn't even realize that she was being chatty, probably as a result of all of the adrenaline running through her, but truthfully, if she knew, she probably wouldn't even have cared. You could tell that she felt so good, and also a little uncomfortable with the idea that she had succumbed to getting an epidural, and yet amazed at how amazing her world now felt. She seemed a lot like the kid who was offered a cookie, but instead of accepting it she snuck it out of the cookie jar, and now that she was eating it it tastes SO GOOD. After it set in that she was feeling good, and there was nothing to do, no hard breathing, no focus necessary, she just kind of laid back and enjoyed socializing, after all... what else was she supposed to do. She got people laughing, she made small talk, it became a lot of fun actually. It gave a moment for us to bond, and prepare for the good part of this whole experience... the baby part. It was very, well, human of her, since having Garrett was pretty superhuman to me. She's amazing. It was very cute, and I was so glad that she was feeling so good. -Brad